I’m still taking deep breaths and counting to ten over here, but I have also been focusing on counting my blessings. As much as I desire order and for everything to work out as I have planned in my silly head, I have to remind myself that my children have just as strong of a desire to explore and figure things out on their own. I have to count to ten and let go. I have to count to ten and respond with love and understanding in my voice and eyes instead of frustration and anger. I have to count to ten to remind myself that my children are simply trying to understand their world. I have to count my blessings, and there are too many to count. So how about I focus on that while my daughter is throwing a tantrum at the indoor park because she wants to eat her snack but now she doesn’t want to eat it because I touched it while giving her said snack, and now everyone is staring at me because my child has thrown herself on the floor, and everyone is still staring at me like I should have this under control by now, but holy shit I don’t know how to calm my child down, and now I just want to crawl under the table and drink a margarita with an extra shot of tequila while I wait for this storm to pass. I am slowly learning that in these types of situations, all I can do is count my blessings. And there are too many to count, so I will focus on that.
I am thankful for my two children. I am thankful for the joy, love, energy and humor they have brought into my life. My world would fall apart without them, so I’ll take every moment I can get with them. Not all of the moments are delightful, but all of the moments are ours.
I am thankful for my son. I am thankful for his desire to test his limits –even though it scares me sometimes– because he is teaching me to live life with less fear. I am thankful for his sensitivity –even though it may cause him to cry over things that I know are not worth crying about– because his tears show that he cares so passionately about justice and the world around him. I am thankful for his incessant questioning of my authority and requests –even though it drives me crazy– because it means that my son is curious and not so willing to let things happen without analyzing it first. I am thankful for his wild actions –even though these actions make my days seem even crazier and out-of-control– because my son is showing me that life is so much more fun when you simply live in the moment. I am thankful for my son. Without him, I would lose my sense of adventure and curiosity.
I am thankful for my daughter. I am thankful for her strong-willed nature –even though it makes me want to go into my room and scream into a pillow at times– because she is teaching me to be more assertive and to have more confidence in my abilities. I am thankful for her desire to be independent –even though it causes her to experience much frustration throughout the day– because her need to attempt to accomplish difficult tasks on her own shows that she is not afraid to try new things by herself. I am thankful for her need to be held and snuggled –even when I am trying to make dinner– because it means that she values and seeks companionship. I am thankful for her boisterous actions –even though these actions cause my heart to beat faster and my eardrums to hurt– because my daughter is showing me that life is meant to be lived passionately every single day. I am thankful for my daughter. Without her, my voice would be much quieter.
I am thankful for my son and daughter. Not all of our moments are perfect, but all of our moments together are ours. What are you thankful for? Let’s count our blessings together.